All Over the Place

I gave this blog its title before I ever started writing it because it describes where my mind has been for the last seven days. It’s been Spring Break (from work not school) so I have had quite a bit of free time this past week, and it has been so good. For starters, my dad and I set in stone a date for our American River Trail ride. It’s going to be a 64+ mile day so I’ve used some of my free time this week to get back into riding. My legs were pretty thrashed after the first day, now after three solid rides they feel great and I’m loving being back in the saddle.

I’ve also had a lot of time for reading. If memory serves, I have finished 5 books this week. One was my Greek textbook, another was God Wants to Save by Christians by Rob “No One Feels Neutral about Me” Bell. It was kind of surreal to finish the Greek text and it also signals that it is now time to start translating 1 John from Greek to English. Should be fun!! The Bell book had some interesting points, but also left me wondering if he has ever taken a biblical interpretation class. I also finished The Emerging Church by Dan Kimball, which had some great points and ideas, but got really repetitive towards the end. The other two were An Introduction to Liberation Theology by Leonardo and Clodovis Boff and Two Views of Hell by Fudge and Peterson. Both for class, both interesting. I don’t want to talk about reading anymore.

I just found out today that I am going to Nicaragua in June and July if everything works out. I am excited about this. I went to Central America twice in college and I can’t wait to go back. It will be a new country and new people but I can’t wait to get to somewhere not suburban USA and serve alongside local churches and ministries. I didn’t think I would get to go on a trip with my church this year because I was planning on taking summer classes. I didn’t bother applying because I knew class would get in the way. A few weeks after the deadline to go on trips passed I decided not to do any school this summer and instantly regretted not choosing to go on a mission trip. But God, like he tends to do, opened some doors and now I’m going. I’m stoked about doing this with my church and continuing my involvement there, which leads me straight into my next place.

I love the community I’m involved with at Bridgeway Christian Church, particularly with the Young Adult Ministry. It’s been so good to connect and do life with people who are passionate about doing something for God and being available to be used by him. I’ve laughed so hard I’ve cried, had some really deep and meaningful conversations and had the opportunity to exercise my gifts and take part in the ministry that is going on. This past week has been great, and while going back to work will be good, especially all the eating I’ll get to do, I’m going to miss the freedom to do whatever I want all day long. It makes me wish I was indepently wealthy so I could be a philanthropist and travel the world and ride my bike and read tons of books all day. Feels good to write this near the end of it too. Happy Easter.

Written on: April 23^rd, 2011

At: It’s a Grind

Listening to: The employees reorganizing the tables

Talking to God?

My prayer life has undergone a few noticeable changes (two to be exact) in the recent past. I start by confessing I don’t talk to God nearly as much as I should or would like too. I’m easily distracted and quick to rationalize away the need, so there, now you know.

The first change came about as the result of a conversation with a good friend and mentor who had been going through a very trying and difficult season in his life. Through the pain and hardship he was faithful to pray and seek God. His advice to me in regards to prayer was to pray for exactly what I want to happen. Essentially his point was that there is no use pretending the words “God if it’s your will” are an honest reflection of the heart of most people. That makes so much sense to me because honestly, when I’m hurting and life is hard, what I want is for God to fix it, and I’m coming to believe that he’d rather hear me be honest about my struggles than pray half-heartedly that his will would be done. Because honestly, his will might be that it doesn’t get easier. Practical example: as my grandpa’s health deteriorated late last year, I started praying that God would heal him. I confessed the selfishness of that prayer, but also that it was the honest desire of my heart. My grandpa die in November, but I didn’t feel like God had let me down. Instead I felt like being honest had drawn me deeper into God’s love and I felt him close to me in the middle of the pain and loss. Here’s what I’m trying to say. God knows your heart, so share it with him and realize that although he might not give you what you want, that raw, unfiltered honesty creates closeness and intimacy that will guide you through your storm.

The other change is the result of a book I read and a class lecture about said book. It was called Worship, Community and the Triune God of Grace by James Torrance. It’s a book about how Jesus gave the only acceptable offering to God on the cross, and only through participation in his offering by the Spirit may humanity join in right worship. (This blog just got very theological!!) Consequentially, my prayers have become very Trinitarian. I praise my Heavenly Father for who he is, what he is like and especially for sending Jesus to save me. I thank Jesus for living an obedient life to the Father and laying down his life to purify me of my sins, the only offering that could achieve that. Then I ask the Holy Spirit to reign in me and lift me up in participation with the intercession and worship Jesus is perpetually doing on my behalf. I love praying this way because as I study the Trinity and how important that doctrine is to our faith I realize that I so often neglect to remember that my God is Triune. Torrance raises the point that when most people hear the word God, they do not first think Trinity, which is a mistake because the fact that our God is Triune reminds us that he is communal, personal and loving for all eternity by his very nature.

These are just some random thoughts but I think it’s important to be intentional about the way we pray. We are, after all, talking to the Creator and King of the Universe. Feel free to comment, question, or disagree, but pray about it first!!

Written on: April 9^th, 2011

At: The Commons, WJU

Listening to: Mumford & Sons-Sigh No More

Book Review: Through Painted Deserts by Donald Miller

Disclaimer: I am not a professional book reviewer or anything fancy like that. Just a guy who likes to read and has opinions about said reading. That said, let us begin.

I am a graduate student studying theology so most of the reading I do is fairly academic and complicated. That is why reading Through Painted Deserts: Light God and Beauty on the Open Road by Donald Miller was sweet relief from textbooks and systematic theologies during my spring break this year. I was first introduced to Miller’s writing in the summer of 2006 in the form of his popular book Blue Like Jazz, and have since read Searching for God Knows What and A Million Miles in a Thousand Years. In their own unique ways, each of these books does something for me that deep theological writing does not. Let me be clear, I am not saying that Donald Miller writes about non-complex, unintelligent topics. What I am saying is that he brings freshness, humor, serious consideration and his own personal reflection to the complexities of life and it makes for a great read.

Through Painted Deserts is Miller’s recollections of a road trip he and his friend Paul took from Houston, Texas to Oregon. It was originally published as Prayer and the Art of Volkswagen Maintenance because the vehicle used for the journey was a near-death Volkswagen bus. Miller recalls leaving the massive, urban jungle that is Houston late at night and setting off on a trip with no real agenda other than eventually ending in Oregon, where Paul was from. The dialogue between Don and Paul demonstrates their close friendship which is characterized by brotherly sarcasm and wit. However, their conversations also take them into serious territory like the meaning of life, God, girls and marriage. Like a third protagonist along the way, the VW serves not only as transport but as a place to sleep and is constantly malfunctioning. From the check engine light coming on, to leaking fuel , to dying in the Mojave Desert it frustrates as well as endears itself to Don and Paul. The van takes them through open stretches of land between Texas and Oklahoma, and eventually to the edge of the Grand Canyon in Arizona.

Miller’s tale of hiking to the bottom of the Grand Canyon and back out made my feet hurt. During a visit there I hiked into it for only a few miles and felt the ache in my legs. The beauty of his writing is that it does more than explain what happened. It illustrates it. “My toes are sliding into the front of my boots and my heel has not felt shoe in an hour.” I know that feeling, and even for those who do not it’s easy to imagine. Imagine is a good word for what Miler’s writing invites readers to do.

The narrative continues as Paul, Don and the VW continue through Las Vegas, into California, with a pit stop in Visalia that involves hitting and throwing golf balls at each other, and eventually into Oregon. I read this book with a highlighter, which I do with my texts books as well. However, in this book the goal was not to highlight things I should remember for tests or finals. It was to mark out beautifully written descriptions of events as well as the inner workings of the mind of an artist. I won’t lie, I am jealous of Donald Miller’s writing style. He uses beautiful language and forms words together ranging from torrents of prose to winding streams of poetry. It’s so nice to read, especially if you enjoy good writing. He is a word architect. His prose comes to life and turns the simple act of driving at night into a paragraph filled with power and poignancy. A simple encounter with a stranger humanizes and etches their unique personality into a lasting memory of the moment.

This book is not about God. It is a book about life and all of its deep, rich and meaningful experiences. Which makes it as much about God as anything can be. The point isn’t, “this is what God is like” or “here are the answers to life’s hard questions.” The point is that life makes us ask hard questions and search to understand the God who put us here. And sometimes we have to go on a journey to figure that out. We have to leave the familiar and the safe and head somewhere else. If you can read this book and not want to go on a road trip, something is wrong with you. I know I do.

I want to go east and see the mid-west and drive on highways where you don’t see another car for one hundred miles. I want to see mountains and rivers and oceans and be speechless in the presence of their beauty. I want to see the sun set over Badland deserts and rise over Pacific cliffs. I want to go home to eastern Washington and see the mighty Columbia and the windswept deserts. I want to drive all day and think about the incredible world I live in and the God who spoke into existence so his image bearers could have a fantastic place to reside. But a road trip is not the only way to go on the journey. It may just be that we need to try something new, or interact with someone who is different than we are. We are on the path of life and it’s a shame if we don’t let it carry us somewhere new and exciting. Somewhere we can wrestle with what we believe not so that when we arrive we can have all the answers, but so that we can say, it was good to realize there were questions.

Written on: April 2^nd, 2011

At: The Commons, WJU

Listening to: Coldplay-Parachutes

Launch

Here I am once again writing things down, or typing them out, or whatever, wondering if someday someone will actually want to read them. Maybe they will, maybe they won’t, but I think this time I have to keep writing, if for nothing else, my sanity. For me writing is a release. Some people do it because they “have to” and others because they are really good at it and make tons of money, and who knows why else? But for me it’s therapy. It’s getting all the thoughts and ideas in my head onto paper, or web space, or whatever.

I’ve been called a good writer before. Mostly by my mom, which is nice of her, but also by teachers and professors who say nice things and swell my pride to the bursting point. I’m not going to lie; I’d love to write a book that sells lots of copies or have a blog site that gets lots of hits. But even if I never do, I need to write because there is too much going on in my head to not put some of it somewhere else.

I used to write and then throw what I wrote away, or delete it. I wonder how many chapters of my book I could have filled with that stuff? It’s sort of irrelevant now. This is a new chapter and a fresh start. This is me writing what I think about, wrestling with what I am studying, reviewing what I am reading and really just filling space. There is a lot of space to be filled and a lot that needs to be said. I don’t think sitting on a gift people with brains and PhD’s say you should use is a wise investment. So here this thing goes. It’s going to be honest (when I feel like it), deep (sometimes), raw (maybe?), intelligent (hahaha) and who knows what else? Here we go!!!

Written on: April 2^nd, 2011

At: The Commons, WJU

Listening to: Gungor-Beautiful Things